What is NVC?

Non-Violent Communication Assumptions

• Everybody is capable of compassion for others
• All actions are attempts to meet a need
• There are enough resources for everyone's needs to be met. Our choices don't have to be zero-sum.

Language matters. Avoid:

• Moral judgments
  • ("You shouldn't have done... This was wrong...")
• Demands
• Denial of responsibility
• Comparisons between people, present or not
• Language about merit 
  • ("I deserve ___...")

Components of NVC

1. Observation
2. Feelings
3. Needs
4. Request

Observation

• Facts of what happened
• Use objective language
• Try not to generalise; be specific

Feelings

• How did that incident make you feel?
• Don't rationalise, judge, assess
• Be honest

Needs

• What is it that you need?
• In what way was that need not met?

Request

• Make a specific request to a specific person
• Be concrete and positive
• Be open to "no"

Recap

1. Make an observation
2. Describe your feeling
3. Express your need
4. Articulate a request

RETRO TIME

Identify:

 

What went well 😀

 

What could have been better 😓

 

What experiments can we try
between now and the next retro? ⚗