Is There Life After JS?

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AlmeríaJS 2018-12-26

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JavaScript Grows

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JavaScript Evolves

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JavaScript Is Everywhere

Elsa Lanchester - The Bride of Frankenstein (1935)

JavaScript Is Still Young

Da Fiucha Is Here

EcmaScript 2018

Proposal Pipeline

  • Stage 3: 14

  • Stage 2: 17

  • Stage 1: 43

  • Stage 0: 21

EcmaScript 2030


You in Ten Years

FLORIDA canned citrus juices, 1949 ad

Is JavaScript Enough?

🍁~Stay high~🍁

We Should See Other People

Learn One Framework Per Year

The hamster wheel stops for no one!

Learn One Language Per Year

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Libraries in TypeScript

TypeScript Features

Backwards compatible


Types take 80% of your time


Widely used in libraries


Libraries in C For Node.js

Trash GIF - Falling GIFs

C Features

Extremely obnoxious pointers

Manual memory management

A uniform (and outdated) memory model

Very fast (when stars and pointers align)

Can be called from anywhere (with difficulty)

Very crashy

Libraries in Web Assembly

The strangest part of the lightsaber duel in Revenge of the Sith.

WASM Features

Most of the cons of C

Few of the pros

Should be fast from JS (some day soon)

Should not be written by hand

→ add the drawbacks of C

Other Environments

Java Can Help You

Java Features

Controlled by Oracle

Verbose -vvv

Feels very productive, isn't

Lots of annoying boilerplate

"Hello World" Is over 60k lines of code

Using Spring is 2 lines + 800k lines of XML

Other JVM languages might make it bearable?

Golang Can Help You

This Is Fine Anxiety GIF - ThisIsFine Anxiety Calm GIFs

Go Features

Invented by Google

Controlled by Google



Bro's Delight Go

Python Can Help You

Python Features



Did I say beautiful?

Useful for machine learning

So, not really useful?

Can split-brain the community at any moment

PHP Can Help You

Indian roadside refuse fires produce toxic rainbow

PHP Features

Highly inconsistent

Make a mess, but fast

Enter the world of Wordpress

and abandon all hope

Be despised by colleagues and family

Exotic Languages

Lua Can Help You

Doctor X (1932)

Lua Features

Very simple language

Gets rapidly complicated

Looks like a weird toy always

Only for the pure of heart

Erlang Can Help You

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Erlang Features

Invented by an evil genius

Pure functional

No, really

Can only be written with IQ > 180

Will permanently distort your brain

Save the young! There is still time

Perl Can Help You

Indian roadside refuse fires produce toxic rainbow

Perl Features

Uses a lot of fancy characters:

$ # _ & %

Image result for filemon diciendo palabrotas

It can be entirely forgotten in a few years

Into the Unknown

Languages to Look Out For






Rockstar Can Help You

Become a rockstar developer!
Midnight takes your heart and your soul
While your heart is as high as your soul
Put your heart without your soul into your heart

Give back your heart

Desire is a lovestruck ladykiller
My world is nothing 
Fire is ice
Hate is water
Until my world is Desire,
Build my world up
If Midnight taking my world, Fire is nothing and Midnight taking my world, Hate is nothing
Shout "FizzBuzz!"
Take it to the top

If Midnight taking my world, Fire is nothing
Shout "Fizz!"
Take it to the top

If Midnight taking my world, Hate is nothing
Say "Buzz!"
Take it to the top

Whisper my world

Get Out of Your Comfort Zone!

Darwin Awards - Runner Up