Becoming Ourselves

How do we become who we are?

Inspired by Craig N. Shealy & Daniel Kahneman

Understanding ourselves and others is a core human need.

It fundamentally impacts the way:

we view ourselves,

we perceive others,

we experience hope and despair,

we develop a sense of purpose in this world.

Our current ways of learning often approach students

as if they were empty vessels into which content can be poured.

is determined by our whole being

Yet research reveals that any personal learning

and by the way we have become who we are.

We often think that we draw our conclusions

from our rational arguments.


Yet, in reality we usually choose our arguments


in order to justify our worldviews,

which have developed throughout our lives.​

(*as researched by nobel prize winning psychologist Dr. Daniel Kahneman)

Our human self includes all

that has passed through our consciousness:

Our Memories

Our Actions

Our Desires

Our Pains

Our self gets structured, through our accumulated experiences:

how we perceive ourselves,

how we build our goals,

how we engage with the world.

(*as researched by psychologist Dr. Craig N. Shealy)


In INFANCY we have the potential to evolve in many different directions.

We are utterly dependent and get shaped by our interactions

and by the way our core needs are met (e.g. warmth, security).

´Merged Self´




In CHILDHOOD our sense of self emerges in interaction with the world.

We attempt to satisfy our core needs which shape our Internal Experience of reality.

                                   We develop our beliefs,

 which cluster into our values,

and our self-images.

´Emerging Self´


By ADULTHOOD we have developed a sense of self.

We view events through our frame of reference

which shapes the way how we experience life.

´Established Self´


Our beliefs and values cluster into our worldviews,

which respond to and protect our core needs such as:

achievement and

   life purpose.


´Established Self´

Our worldviews shape deeply who we are.

So we respond with resistance when our views are challenged.


´Established Self´