a statistical risk calculation for horror, normalized for population and duration
World avg
US avg
LA
0.005%
99.6%
99.5%
99.6%
0.005%
0.006%
Chance of living* 75 yrs
avg % of pop killed/yr
*chance of not dying from cause of "excess" death (murder, supernatural, etc). Neglected all aspects common to "normal" populations
* (as calculated from homicide deaths / yr and population estimates)
Pros:
- Mike Myers, hide-n-seek champion
Avoid if:
- You are a babysitter, plan to become a babysitter, or date a babysitter
0.014%
99.0%
Haddonfield, Il
found him!
101 deaths in 24 yrs
(not counting Rob Zombie remakes and after)
Pros:
- "A Nice Place to Live"
- great place for a 24hr coffee shop
Avoid if:
- You have narcolepsy
- You have or want kids
0.015%
98.9%
Springwood, Ohio
34 deaths in15 yrs
Pros:
- good sewer system
- great architecture
- Pennywise probably available for parties
Avoid if:
- You're under ~13 yrs old
0.030%
97.8%
Derry, Maine
9 deaths in 1 yr
(Bangor)
0.051%
96.2%
Raccoon City, ?
Pros:
Cons:
- t-virus
- corporate-run oligarchy, is it so different than here?
970 deaths in 19 yrs
7 film series, skewed by only counting on-screen deaths
0.057%
95.8%
Silent Hill (Centralia, Penn.) - movies
Pros:
- dance troupe ready
Cons:
102 deaths in 6 yrs
Amity Island, Mass.
0.066%
95.2%
Pros:
- opening to be replacement salty sea dog weirdo
- prob easy to find an abandoned boat
- minimal law enforcement
Cons:
- Summer tourists
- mayor's a dick
12 deaths in 2 yrs
Con:
- If you're going to die in a slasher, do you really want it to be this one?
0.090%
93.5%
Woodsboro, CA
Pros:
- Matthew Lillard
63 deaths in 27 yrs
Crescent Cove, CA
0.098%
92.9%
48 deaths in 1 yrs
filmed in Santa Cruz (1988)
Pros:
- funnier than actual clowns
Cons:
- nightmare for Coulrophobes
Lake Placid, Maine
0.140%
90%
Pros:
- Betty White
- Great story to tell if you're part of Fish & Game Service
40 deaths in 13 yrs
Cabot Cove, Maine
0.140%
90.0%
Pros:
- catchy theme song
Cons:
- hard to find somewhere open for dinner after 8pm
60 deaths in 12 yrs
Castle Rock, Maine
0.156%
89%
Cons:
- your fate linked to Stephen King's mental state
The Dead Zone, Cujo, The Body, Uncle Otto's Truck, The Dark Half, The Sun Dog, Needful Things
Pros:
- Maine is lovely
28 deaths in 12 yrs
Kingston Falls, Penn.
0.220%
84.8%
Suspiciously familiar town....
Cons:
- town likely to adopt strict pet ownership laws
- high risk of traumatic chimney cleaning
Pros:
- sole source of Peltzer Inventions:
"Fantastic ideas for a fantastic world. I make the illogical logical."
22 deaths in 1 yr
0.239%
Using original population before studio exec interference (5,120) ... too many small towns on TV
83.6%
Twin Peaks, WA
(North Bend)
49 deaths in 4 yrs
sucks to die here, all anyone ever remembers is Laura...
(Fire Walk with Me + two seasons)
Sunnydale, CA
0.342%
77.3%
Pros:
- high chance of zaney adventures, if you can make it past one season
- decent bar/coffee shop/venue
Cons:
- high chance of world's worst brow furrow prior to cheesy "turning to dust" effect
Verdict: worth it for the musical episode
718 deaths in 7 yrs
Hawkins, In
0.427%
72.6%
Note:
Chance of death strongly depends on your DnD party
320 deaths in 6 yrs
Crystal Lake, NJ
Just go camping elsewhere
0.656%
61.1%
highest death count of the slashers
(not counting times Jason has died)
118 deaths in 9 yrs
only counting first 8 movies, nothing after Jason Takes Manhatten
used population of Hope, NJ filming location
Antonio Bay, CA (Point Reyes Station)
0.708%
58.7%
Pros:
Cons:
6 deaths in 1 yr
Cuesta Verde, CA
Pros:
- No need to use psychedelics
- Never been a better time in the US to join a creepy religious cult
- TV static is non-issue now
Cons:
- It's always a bad trip
- Call before you dig!
1.3%
37.5% - event was one-off?
13 deaths in 1 yr
LV-462: Hadley's Hope
Pros:
- Another successful colony brought to you by Weyland Yutani
- great opportunity for an exobiologist
- should be fine if you're synthetic
Cons:
- likely to become living host for xenomorph ... game over, man
99.367%
~0%
157 deaths in 1 yr
Hobb's End, Mass.
Pros:
- Sam Neill
- excellent school system (Miskatonic U)
- with this many deaths, doesn't really matter where you live
Cons:
- everyone on Earth dies, save 1
- psychological horrors beyond imagination
avg % of pop killed: 99.999+%
~0% chance of living 75 yrs
5,675,514,219 deaths in 1 yr