Learn more about the human rights challenges facing lesbian, gay, bi, trans and intersex (LGBTIQ+) people everywhere and the actions that can be taken to tackle violence and discrimination and protect the rights of LGBTIQ+ people everywhere.
(United Nations Human Rights)

Why pronouns matter

Identity is at the core of what makes you who you are. Using a person’s chosen name and pronouns is a way to show respect and kindness. By simply asking how a person would like to be addressed, you can make a world of difference to them.

How do I use gender- neutral pronouns?

When you’re unsure of someone’s gender or when gender is irrelevant, it’s often best to use the person’s name instead of “him” or “her.”

A widely used and fully accepted gender-neutral pronoun is they. It works for both singular and plural references and is easy to use in everyday speech and writing. Here are some examples:

• “I spoke to the marketing director, and they said they’d get back to me.”

• “I think someone left their laptop behind.”

• “Who’s in charge of that campaign? I’ll email them.”

When giving a speech:

“Ladies and gentlemen” has long been a standard way to address a group in formal settings. While polite, it is also old-fashioned and not inclusive, since many people do not identify as either a lady or a gentleman. Fortunately, there are simple, modern alternatives that include everyone, such as “Welcome, everyone,” “Dear audience,” or “Esteemed guests.”

Avoid “he/she” in formal writing
 

Using he/she, him/her, or his/her is grammatically correct, but in modern formal writing these forms are considered awkward, old-fashioned, and needlessly clumsy. Instead, English now prefers more natural, inclusive alternatives. Instead, use the singular “they”

This is the most common and widely accepted alternative in both academic and everyday English.

Instead of: Each student must bring his/her laptop.
Write: Each student must bring their laptop.

Another option is to rewrite the sentence in the plural, which is a very useful strategy in essays.

Instead of: A learner improves his/her vocabulary through practice.
Write: Learners improve their vocabulary through practice.

THEMSELVES vs. THEMSELF – How to Use Them
 

1. Themselves

The most common and safest choice in almost all situations.
 

a) Plural subjects

Use themselves when the subject is they and refers to more than one person.
Example: The students are enjoying themselves.

b) Singular “they” (gender-neutral)

Use themselves when “they” refers to one person whose gender is unknown or irrelevant.
This is the option that is widely accepted in schools, essays, and exams.
Example: A person should choose a career that is fulfilling to themselves.

c) Emphasis

Use themselves for emphasis.
Example: The cities themselves are changing rapidly.

THEMSELVES vs. THEMSELF – How to Use Them

2. Themself

Less common and still considered nonstandard in some style guides.

a) Singular “they”

You may use themself when referring to one person who prefers this pronoun.
It appears increasingly often in modern English.
Example: Justin helped themself to another serving of dinner.

b) Formal writing

Avoid themself in formal essays unless you have a clear reason to use it.
Many exam boards still prefer themselves for singular “they.”

c) Informal writing

Themself is acceptable in informal contexts, especially when referring to someone who personally uses this form.

#Hän is the inclusive Finnish pronoun that stands for equal opportunity.
(English video with English subtitles)

Gender inclusive language: Why is it Important?
(Includovate, 2023)

What is gendered language, and why should you be aware of it?
(The Writing Center, UNC)