John Dugan is a respected professional author who is noted for his contributions to a variety of news organizations, magazines and websites.
After man invented the wheel, he invented “blue balls” soon after as a reason why he needed some sexual satisfaction. This theory quickly gained steam throughout the world as men everywhere found common ground in the belief that if they didn’t “relieve the tension,” they may die, or at minimum, their balls would fall off (and then they’d die). Now, while it sounds completely fabricated, it is actually a real thing. While it can be painful, it isn’t as dire as it sounds. Let’s break down what the Blue Balls Myth actually is, why the condition is not good for men, and how to treat it.
What Is Blue Balls?
The balls may not turn blue, but that aside, it is a real thing that happens to men when they are sexually aroused for an extended period of time without release. The fancy medical term for blue balls is epididymal hypertension. The epididymis is the tube that transports sperm from the testes to the vas deferens, which aids in its explosive departure from the body via the urethra.
Now, when release is delayed or thwarted, pressure builds in the region, which causes a general ache in the testicles. The name blue balls come from the pain a man generally feels, which is usually associated with the same ache as bruising in a different part of the body. So, there it is. No one is really walking around with Papa Smurf balls, except, well, Papa Smurf.
How Can Blue Balls Negatively Impact Men?
Psychologically and sexually, men can feel not only frustration but also some level of rejection, which can be damaging to their self-esteem. However, they shouldn’t, and if they do, an open line of communication is the best way to relieve it.
Physically, blue balls is only dangerous if it is truly excessive and causes a man to continue to feel the pain after release. If that pain continues, it could be a symptom of an inflammation of the epididymis, caused by an infection, and that needs immediate medical intervention.
De-Bluing the Balls
How can a man treat blue balls? Most times, the pressure will fade on its own. If it’s not going away without an intervention, here are a few of the most common ways to relieve the discomfort.
Play Whack a Mole. Not the arcade game, but the self-pleasure sort. Find some lube and get to stroking. It probably won’t take too long in this blue state.
Work on Your Biceps. Exercise pulls the blood flow from the penis and relieves the pressure. A side benefit of this is that it helps with healthy blood flow, which creates stronger erections for times when a man needs them.
Poop It Out. Weren’t expecting that one, eh? Funnily enough, hunkering down for a BM can pull the pressure from the testicles and reallocate it to other blood vessels in the body. It’s a two-for-one!
Jump in the Shower – Pick a Temperature. There’s an old wives’ tale that the sexually frustrated just need to take a cold shower. That can work by freezing out the sexual urges and pressure in the area. Some men, however, prefer a nice warm shower to relax the blood vessels. No matter which a man chooses, he should hang out in there until the pressure decreases. Of course, a man should make the most of his time by thoroughly cleaning and rinsing the penis. It’s also a good idea to slather on a specially formulated penis health creme (health professionals recommend Man 1 Man Oil, which has been clinically proven safe and mild for skin). Crèmes such as these, which contain vitamin C, promote good blood flow and erectile function for when it’s time to get physical. Choose a crème that also includes L-carnitine to protect against nerve damage that can accompany pressure and compression.
Blue Balls Is Real…But So Not a Big Deal
By John Dugan