It's not your job
to love your job
by Keziyah Lewis
#YouGotThisConf
#YouGotThisLove
she/her
"2 weeks of runway"
17
getting paid late
lack of management
company taking big financial risks
realized job didn't align with values
lots of busywork
no career progression
groupthink
many new hires with little runway
About me:
- Web developer
- Digital nomad
- JuniorsInTech.com
- @KeziyahL
It's not your job to love your job
of workers are engaged at work.
34%
11%
in the US
in the UK
Only
1
2
38%
of workers missed a child's important event for work
24%
of working parents say their kids have asked them to work less
14
14
2.5
weeks more than the average EU worker
UK workers work
15
1/3
Only
rd
of UK workers have found a good work life balance
16
Overview
1. Why I stayed
2. How they kept me
3. What I'd do now
How our brains trick us into "loving" jobs that are bad for us
Strategies employers use to keep workers around
How to protect yourself
The psychology of "this is fine"
KC Green
1- Why I stayed
6
Bartels & Zeki (2004)
Positive Illusion
"Certain illusions may be adaptive for mental health and well being."
- unrealistically positive self evaluations
- exaggerated perceptions of control
- unrealistic optimism
7
Taylor & Brown, 1988
Positive illusion makes us think everything is fine, even if it's not.
Positive illusions are why we stick with jobs we know aren't good for us
(Maybe employers know this)
getting paid late
lack of management
company taking big financial risks
realized job didn't align with values
lots of busywork
no career progression
groupthink
many new hires with little runway
Everything will be ok.
Overview
1. Why I stayed
2. How they kept me
How our brains trick us into "loving" jobs that are bad for us
Strategies employers use to keep workers around
2. How they kept me
Strategies employers use to keep workers around
a. hero story
We believed in the company.
We cared about the company.
We fought for the company.
Hero Story
a positive, inspiring narrative about the origins, mission, and operations of a company and/or its founders
- humble origins
- exaggerated impact on the world
- minimization of harm done to society
Humble origins
Steve Jobs' garage
Exaggerated impact on the world
"Pioneering a new model of higher education..."
Exaggerated impact on the world
“You all are part of something that is a revolution. What higher purpose is there?”
- Elizabeth Holmes
Minimization of harm done to society
"...we partnered with Peace Direct, a nonprofit building peace in areas of conflict around the world"
awaytravel.com
Minimization of harm done to society
(Facebook.com)
"It's not enough to simply connect the world, we must also bring the world closer together."
- humble origins
- exaggerated impact on the world
- minimization of harm done to society
We want to be a part of their story.
Hero story:
9/10
42%
12
13
people are willing to earn less money to do more meaningful work
of workers want to work for an org that has a positive impact on the world
Are hero stories bad?
No.
But if you're not careful, you might find yourself drinking the kool aid.
(I know because I did.)
"I trust [Founder 1] and [Founder 2]..."
- me to a reporter on the first day of my job
"Originally, Avery had joined for the brand's popularity...but she also had believed in the mission..."
"As the months went by and she got a closer glimpse at the growth and image-obsessed culture, however, she started to feel like the mission was just a smokescreen to get employees to work harder and longer."
2. How they kept me
Strategies employers use to keep workers around
a. hero story
We believed in the company.
b. (forced) familiarity
We cared about (people in) the company.
Forced Familiarity
when companies promote the idea that everyone at the company cares for one another
- company appears to have employee best interests in mind
> 50%
of tech workers have a work BFF
70%
of workers say having a friend at work is crucial to having a happy work life
20
19
1.4x
more likely to receive praise if you have a work BFF
20
- describing colleagues as "family"
- talking about self care & work life balance
- encouraging "bringing your whole self to work"
- claiming to care about D & I
- encouraging transparency and openness
- having company values like empathy and compassion
Most of these are good!
But they may not reflect the reality of how companies are actually run.
"and we are not a typical "work hard/play hard" startup. We are responsible adults with diverse backgrounds and interests, who take our careers and our lives seriously. We believe that the best way to iterate towards success is by taking care of ourselves, our families, our users, and one another. We aim for a sustainable approach to work and life, because that is the best way to maximize long-term speed, while retaining clarity of vision. Compassion is our strategy."
npm.com
"In an email to The Register, he said there appeared to be a disconnect between the company's professed values and its behavior."
"There was recently an all-hands meeting at which employees were encouraged to ask frank questions about the company's new direction. Those who spoke up were summarily fired last week, the individual said, at the recommendation of an HR consultant."
21
If one person was forced to stay, the rest were likely to follow suit. “They exploited the fact that we were close,” she says. “They knew we would take a bullet for each other and they just used it. Everyone was crushed. But they weren’t going to leave if their friends stayed.”
Two things to remember about false familiarity:
- more familiarity == fewer boundaries
- fewer boundaries can lead to exploitation
- caring about your colleagues & bosses is fine. but don't ignore the power dynamic.
2. How they kept me
Strategies employers use to keep workers around
a. hero story
We believed in the company.
b. (forced) familiarity
We cared about the company.
c. noble sacrifice
We fought for the company.
Noble Sacrifice
Employers pressure workers into sacrificing for the greater good of the company
- working long hours or doing extra work
- getting paid less or taking a pay cut
“Employees joining Kickstarter sometimes take a salary that is lower than market rate because they believe in Kickstarter’s mission and want to lend their labor to a meaningful cause,” a former employee told me. Kickstarter was supposed to be better than other tech companies. That’s why they worked there."
22
"The queue of unanswered customer emails kept growing, and the team was too small to keep up. "
"But Caroline knew it wasn’t over. She was overworked and underpaid, but something in her wanted to keep going. “I wanted to move closer to work so I could work more, but I couldn’t afford it,” she says."
While asking for sacrifice, employers reiterate
- how employees contribute to the hero story
- how much the company cares for them
"if you had told me just a few years ago during the Holidays of 2015 that I would be working with 13 of the most dedicated, accomplished, professional, energetic, lovely, and caring girls I've ever encountered in my professional and person life"
"I hope that you all understand that I have to pinch myself every day, sometimes to wake up because I am very sleepy, but mostly to prove to myself that this life I live is real and is wild and exciting and unexpected and beautiful all because I spend most hours of my week with you all. This past month has challenged us all in ways we never expected when we walked in the doors of Away. I think you all knew you were walking into something special, but I never could have accurately outlined for you what this ride would be like because I am still uncovering new twists and turns and seatbelts and emergency brakes myself. Beyond the sheer number of hours that you have worked and cases you have resolved, the thing that blows me away is how you have all stayed so positive, so optimistic, so light, and so honest amongst challenges from every different angle."
Is it worth it?
2. How they kept me
Strategies employers use to keep workers around
a. hero story
We believed in the company.
b. (forced) familiarity
We cared about the company.
c. noble sacrifice
We fought for the company.
Overview
1. Why I stayed
2. How they kept me
3. What I'd do now
How our brains trick us into "loving" jobs that are bad for us
Strategies employers use to keep workers around
How to protect yourself
Be a little cynical
Don't drink the Kool Aid.
Prepare for the worst
You never know what's going to happen.
Colleagues == community
Watch each other's back.
Put yourself first.
Love yourself more than your job.
It's not your job
to love your job
Twitter: @KeziyahL
It's not your job to love your job (old)
By Keziyah Lewis
