Addictions and
Pathways of Healing

Personal
History

Parenting

Lifestyle

Mentorship

Relationships

Reminders

Children

Adolescents

Parents

Counsellors

Teachers

Where are
We Now?

(a short list)

Screen Time

Evolution

Development

Addictions

Emotions

Risks

Meals

Car

Bedrooms

(A very, very bad idea.)

Social

Outdoors

Moment of
Honesty

The First Main Issue:

Self-Regulation

Self-Regulation:

The ability to modulate the nervous system (emotions)

 

It must be learned in childhood and adolescence.

It is correlated with life success and social/emotional health more than any other factor.

It is contingent upon the default mode.

Stillness

Reflection

Wonder

Discovery

Artificial Regulation

Chemistry

(substance addictions)

Attention

(technology addictions)

Same Results

Different

Pathways

Addiction

Self-Regulation Training

Self-Regulation Training

The Second Main Issue:

Absence of Mentorship

200,000 Years

Technology

(substitute mentorship)

Isolation

No
Adulthood

No Mentorship

Mentorhsip

Gap

Belonging

Trust

Emotional Safety

Autonomy

Identity

Empowerment

Mentorsip

Completes

Belonging

Hallucinogens
Fantasy

Trust

Opioids
Television
Social Media

Autonomy

Stimulants
Strategic Gaming

Identity

Identification

Empowerment

Alcohol
Violent Gaming

Addictions

Temporarily Complete

No completion without mentorship.

No completion without self-regulation.

 

No identity and adulthood
without completion.

Escape

Dissociation
Flight Response
Hallucinogens
Fantasy

Solace

Depression
Freeze Response
Opioids, Social Media
Screen Solace

Departure

Anxiety
Orienting Response
Stimulants, Gambling
Strategic Gaming

Disguise

Artificial Self
Artificial Balance
Marijuana
Identification

Defiance

Anger
Fight Response
Alcohol
Violent Gaming

Addictions

(for families)

Age 0-3

Zero screen time

Age 4-6

Self-regulation training

Age 6-9

Collaborative development.

No devices in bedrooms!

Age 15-18

Self-regulation completion

through mentorship!

Guidelines

Age 9-15

Collaborative management,

shared homework

The Essence of Mentorship

A mentor is someone who can assist a child (or adult) to complete their unfinished childhood themes and to further develop their character.

 

After parenting, it is the most important role a human being can undertake (despite the low status it earns).

Counsellors are mentors.

The Essential Goals of
Adolescent Mentorship

To help youth complete traumatic
 or fragmented childhood development.

1

To help youth develop
self-awareness, empathy, and character.

2

Start Here

Explore the emotional benefits that clients derive
from online and addictive cultures...

and find ways of meeting those emotional needs
also in the non-online world.

And Do This

Try to make it fun...

Be Honest

(about your use)

Exposure

(avoid early)

Naloxone

(kits to every kid)

Mentorship

(alternatives to partying)

Strategy

(partying culture)

Substance
Addictions

Prevention

Culture of Endorsement

Artificial
Regulation

Substitute
Self

Cognitive Impairment

(unnoticed)

Absence of Clarity

(moment)

Marijuana

(challenges)

A Solution?

This suggests a focus on
group work for counsellors.

Healthy Groups

The impulse to form groups is healthy.

But without healthy adult mentors,
adolescents form youth gangs.
Addictions are the result
(other bad things also).

Development Requires Risk​

(Safe Risk)

for Clients

Belonging

Trust

Autonomy

Mentorship

Hope

Emotional
Safety

for Clients

Core
Values

Growth
Mindset

Meta-
cognition

Healing
Trauma and
Addictions

Self-
regulation

Self-
Awareness

for Client Groups

Apply the
No Asshole
Rule

Cultivate
Relationships

Protect
Relationships

Curb
Asshole
Behaviour

Empathic
Listening

Empathy
Development

for Clients

Ethical
Principles

Speaking the
Unspoken

Personal
Responsibility

Mentorship
of
Others

Resilience and Conflict
Resolution

Character
Development

for Escapists

Running

Calibration of
Self-regulation

Focus Events

Challenging Dissociation

Competition

Safe Fighting

High Intensity

Cultivation of Presence

Group Events

Cultivation of Belonging

Activities

Group
Running

Calibration of
Self-regulation

Strength Training

Cultivation of Containment

Competition

Safe Fighting

Mindfulness

Cultivation of Presence

for Solace

Activities

Group Events

Cultivation of Belonging

Trail
Running

Calibration of
Self-regulation

Craft Work

Containment and Expression

Competition

Safe Fighting

Strategy

Cultivation of
Active Choosing

Group Events

Cultivation of Belonging

for Departure

Activities

Mountain
Running

Calibration of
Self-regulation

Craft Work

Containment and Expression

Collaboration

Cultivation of Teamwork

Stillness

Cultivation of
Wonder

Mindfulness

Cultivation of Self-regulation

for Defiance

Activities

Race
Training

Development of
True Self-regulation

Culture

Authentic Identity Development
beyond Slacker Culture

Outdoors

Calibration through Nature

Mentorship

Developing Core Values
and Direction

for Disguise

Activities

Education

Easing through Denial

Just One More Thing...

Keep Going

Be Consistent, Engaged,
and Purposeful.

Get in touch if you get stuck.

ross@rosslaird.com

slides.com/rosslaird/addictions

Addictions and Pathways of Healing

By Ross Laird

Addictions and Pathways of Healing

A presentation for counsellors and teachers on the evolution of addictions.

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